The Rough Patch
From a leading clinical psychologist who has counseled couples and individuals for decades, a wise, radical, and optimistic approach to marriage that promises compatibility between an individual’s development and the often relentless demands of a relationship.People today are trying to make their marriages work over longer lives than ever before—for their children’s health and well-being, and for their own. Indeed, among the college-educated, divorce rates have declined. But staying married isn’t always easy. In the brilliant, transformative, and optimistic The Rough Patch, clinical psychologist Daphne de Marneffe explores the extraordinary pushes and pulls of midlife marriage, where our need to develop as individuals can crash headlong into the demands of our relationships.The Rough Patch is divided into chapters that address key problems that challenge marriages: money, alcohol and drugs, the stresses of parenthood, sex, extramarital affairs, lovesickness, health, aging, children leaving home, and dealing with elderly parents.De Marneffe offers readers seasoned wisdom on these difficulties, addressing the psychological, emotional, and relational capacities we must cultivate to overcome them as individuals and as couples. Blending research, interviews, and clinical experience, and writing with uncommon insight into the daily behaviors of men and women, de Marneffe dives deep into the workings of love and the structures of relationships. Every reader will find himself or herself in these pages.Intimate and sometimes gritty, The Rough Patch is an essential, compassionate resource for people trying to understand “where they are” on the continuum of marriage, giving them a chance to share in other people’s stories and struggles. With humor and deep seriousness, de Marneffe helps men and women understand themselves in order to move in the direction we’re all trying to go: a life lived with integrity, vitality, and love.

The Rough Patch Details

TitleThe Rough Patch
Author
LanguageEnglish
ReleaseJan 23rd, 2018
PublisherScribner
ISBN-139781501118913
Rating
GenrePsychology, Nonfiction, Romance

The Rough Patch Review

  • Cristine Mermaid
    January 1, 1970
    To be fair, this is an ARC so it hasn't completely been edited yet so a couple of the issues I have with it may not be relevant by the time it is actually released.I started reading this on break and it resonated. I am their demographic. I related to so much of it and it was incredibly reassuring to learn that my feelings/thoughts/experiences are quite typical and normal. I highlighted this book like mad because so many thoughts I have that worry me and that I thought were exclusive to me are pe To be fair, this is an ARC so it hasn't completely been edited yet so a couple of the issues I have with it may not be relevant by the time it is actually released.I started reading this on break and it resonated. I am their demographic. I related to so much of it and it was incredibly reassuring to learn that my feelings/thoughts/experiences are quite typical and normal. I highlighted this book like mad because so many thoughts I have that worry me and that I thought were exclusive to me are perfectly normal considering circumstances and that alone made the book worth reading.The only reason I didn't give it 5 is because the author made a few comments that seemed to be a bit dismissive of stay at home parents, as though we have it easy somehow. Later she was very much in support of how hard it is and that it's a sacrifice for many but those first comments turned me off.Also, there are a few ideas and suggestions but there is no "well this is how you fix it" section so that stopped this from being 5 stores for me.
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  • Wendy
    January 1, 1970
    Trying to make a marriage work in this day and age is difficult with all the outside influences that so easily can rip apart the love and harmony that was initially experienced. “The Rough Patch” which I won through Goodreads Giveaways explores the problems that develop as a marriage progresses and unhappiness emerges when one or both marital partners feel lonely, confused, going through the motions, stuck in a rut or so distraught that they think they’re falling part. Wanting to surrender, esca Trying to make a marriage work in this day and age is difficult with all the outside influences that so easily can rip apart the love and harmony that was initially experienced. “The Rough Patch” which I won through Goodreads Giveaways explores the problems that develop as a marriage progresses and unhappiness emerges when one or both marital partners feel lonely, confused, going through the motions, stuck in a rut or so distraught that they think they’re falling part. Wanting to surrender, escape and start over, often one or both look for encouragement, support and love outside their marriage bed or seek a divorce.Clearly and concisely clinical psychologist Daphne de Maneffe blends her research and clinical experience to explain the “workings of love” and the “structures of relationships” enabling each of us to examine our own marriage and to identify any health issues.Divided into chapters it begins with a brief history of midlife crisis and continues with insight into difficulties that erupt when troubles with money, an addiction, a dalliance, the empty nest syndrome and even aging impinge. With understanding and humor coupled with knowledge from interviews with individuals and couples, De Marneffe gives a sense of hope in her explanations, confident that with help each one of us can find the answer we need to move forward and have the happy marriage everyone longs for.Having gone through midlife crisis and experienced several similar difficulties I found “The Rough Patch” was very perceptive especially in the area of children's welfare. This is a good book to read for anyone entering into a relationship that they want to last.
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  • Susan Underbrink
    January 1, 1970
    A big thank you to NetGalley for the ARC. I am voluntarily reviewing this book. Not sure I got this as I am now separated . Maybe to see how I can avoid making the same mistakes. I found it interesting, but not with many tips. It reconfirmed that what I was feeling wasn't unusual. I may have missed it but I didn't see much on divorce with older children. Overall I found it helpful.
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