When I Am Through with You
“This isn’t meant to be a confession. Not in any spiritual sense of the word. Yes, I’m in jail at the moment. I imagine I’ll be here for a long time, considering. But I’m not writing this down for absolution and I’m not seeking forgiveness, not even from myself. Because I’m not sorry for what I did to Rose. I’m just not. Not for any of it.”Ben Gibson is many things, but he’s not sorry and he’s not a liar. He will tell you exactly about what happened on what started as a simple school camping trip in the mountains. About who lived and who died. About who killed and who had the best of intentions. But he’s going to tell you in his own time. Because after what happened on that mountain, time is the one thing he has plenty of.

When I Am Through with You Details

TitleWhen I Am Through with You
Author
FormatHardcover
LanguageEnglish
ReleaseAug 1st, 2017
PublisherDutton Books for Young Readers
ISBN1101994738
ISBN-139781101994733
Number of pages304 pages
Rating
GenreYoung Adult, Thriller, Contemporary, Mystery, Fiction, Mystery Thriller, Suspense, Adventure, Survival, Teen

When I Am Through with You Review

  • Rachel
    July 4, 2017
    What a pleasant surprise. I've never read a YA thriller before, which is why I requested this one on a whim. I was curious. But honestly, my expectations hadn't been very high. More fool me.When I Am Through with You is told from the point of view of Ben, a high school senior who's waiting to go on trial for murder. As his story begins to unfold, we first learn about Rose, his girlfriend of two years who he allegedly ends up murdering. We also learn all about the school hiking trip up in the mou What a pleasant surprise. I've never read a YA thriller before, which is why I requested this one on a whim. I was curious. But honestly, my expectations hadn't been very high. More fool me.When I Am Through with You is told from the point of view of Ben, a high school senior who's waiting to go on trial for murder. As his story begins to unfold, we first learn about Rose, his girlfriend of two years who he allegedly ends up murdering. We also learn all about the school hiking trip up in the mountains that went wrong, as this compelling story of intrigue, adventure, and betrayal develops.This is one of the most addicting books I've ever read. It had me from the very first page. I cared about these characters, who were at once sympathetic and realistically flawed, and I was intrigued by Ben's complicated relationship with Rose. I was drawn into the host of fascinating characters - whip-smart Avery; mean and self-loathing Archie; kind-hearted but unfulfilled Mr. Howe, the history teacher who leads their expedition. Each of these characters is multifaceted, and has their own story to tell.I'd never heard of Stephanie Kuehn before, but I can say with certainty that I will be reading more of her books in the future. I thought her prose was intelligent, compelling, and quick-witted. The pacing in this novel was outstanding - I sat down to start this yesterday and when I blinked hours had gone by. Kuehn brought the scene of this treacherous camping trip to life - I truly felt like I was with this group of students on that mountain. It's been a while since I've read something with such an immersive setting.I highly recommend this to fans of adult and YA thrillers alike. The only thing that served as a constant reminder that this was YA were the ages of the characters - otherwise, I found this novel surprisingly mature and dark and quite twisted.I received an advanced copy of this book from Penguin First To Read in exchange for an honest review. Big thank you to Penguin Random House and Stephanie Kuehn.
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  • Dahlia
    May 13, 2017
    I do not remember the last time I read a book that unputdownable.
  • Jen Ryland
    July 19, 2017
    I've read all but one of Stephanie Kuehn's books. She's an amazing writer who excels at writing characters who are troubled, off-balance, sometimes even a little sinister.But this book was really, really dark. Too grim for me. I should have known I was in trouble when the book referenced Lord of the Flies and Deliverance. And (view spoiler)[ Old Yeller. Seriously now that I've finished that last reference is the most unsettling. (hide spoiler)] And this was just as disturbing.Ben's had a hard li I've read all but one of Stephanie Kuehn's books. She's an amazing writer who excels at writing characters who are troubled, off-balance, sometimes even a little sinister.But this book was really, really dark. Too grim for me. I should have known I was in trouble when the book referenced Lord of the Flies and Deliverance. And (view spoiler)[ Old Yeller. Seriously now that I've finished that last reference is the most unsettling. (hide spoiler)] And this was just as disturbing.Ben's had a hard life and now suffers debilitating migraines as the result of a TBI. He and a group of kids go on a camping/hiking trip in the mountains and ... things don't go well at all. Ben tells you right at the start of the book what he did - kill someone. That sounds bad enough, but the getting there is even worse!If you haven't tried Kuehn's books, you definitely should. But be warned that this one isn't for the faint of heart!Read more of my reviews on JenRyland.com or check out my Bookstagram!
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  • Danielle
    July 30, 2017
    1.5 Stars "Tragedy is infinitely more interesting than bliss. That's the allure of self-destruction. Or so I've found." Oh, this book. I actually started out really liking it. I loved the mystery and I wanted a great thriller to read. Unfortunately, this book completely fell apart at the climax of the story and my interest nosedived. We follow Ben Gibson as he narrates what happened on a disastrous school trip that lead to death, pain, and loss. Things I Liked I really loved the short chapter 1.5 Stars "Tragedy is infinitely more interesting than bliss. That's the allure of self-destruction. Or so I've found." Oh, this book. I actually started out really liking it. I loved the mystery and I wanted a great thriller to read. Unfortunately, this book completely fell apart at the climax of the story and my interest nosedived. We follow Ben Gibson as he narrates what happened on a disastrous school trip that lead to death, pain, and loss. Things I Liked I really loved the short chapters it made it incredible easy to read, even when my interest in the story began to wane.It was really easy to latch on Ben as a characters. It was easy to follow his POV in the story, and his emotions and uncertainty with everything that was happening. Things I Didn't Like I didn't like Rose at all. I thought she was entitled, manipulative, and not really a good girlfriend. (Ben wasn't that great of a boyfriend either, though)The climax of the story shows the students making the stupidest decision possible. From that point on, I didn't care if they died, or got hurt, because they were so incredibly stupid. I lost interest in the story, and I honestly only finished it because it was easy to read.I really wanted to like this, and while it has a solid start, the characters completely ruined the story for me. I'm a character driven reader, so if you like plot or action more you still might like this. And honestly, there wasn't much of a thriller, we know exactly what happened and are only learning the why - and like I said, the characters were largely idiots, so I didn't care. An unfortunate miss for me.I received a copy of the book from Penguin's First to Read Program in exchange for an honest review.
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  • Kathleen
    July 9, 2017
    The target audience for this book is teens, so I'm a couple decades past that target but reading about these characters brought me back to those difficult years. The concern about what other people were thinking and doing, the inability to see past the immediate challenges of family, teachers, grades, high school relationships... it's a confusing time in life. Especially when, like many of the characters in this book, your family life has been far from nurturing.The main character in When I am T The target audience for this book is teens, so I'm a couple decades past that target but reading about these characters brought me back to those difficult years. The concern about what other people were thinking and doing, the inability to see past the immediate challenges of family, teachers, grades, high school relationships... it's a confusing time in life. Especially when, like many of the characters in this book, your family life has been far from nurturing.The main character in When I am Through With You is Ben. We find out right away that Ben has been charged with murder, and that he's not sorry about it. Other than some brief backstory on how he met his girlfriend, Rose, and how he came to be involved in the fateful weekend trip, with people he wasn't exactly friends with. Most of the novel takes place a few suspenseful days spent camping and mountaineering with a group of high school students and one teacher that starts out according to plan, but goes spiraling into chaos due to unexpected situations, misunderstanding, mother nature, young love, and most of all - bad decision-making. When I look back at my teen years, bad decision -making is a recurring theme, as I expect it is for most people. That's why I find books like this especially intriguing. There's so much pressure at that time in your life when you have so little life experience that it's not hard to imagine how easily the wrong mixture of circumstances, hormones, uncertainty, and peer pressure can turn into tragedy. This is a story of just that, in a very compelling and suspenseful read. Thank you to Penguin's First to read program for providing me with an advance copy for review.
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  • Shannon (It Starts At Midnight)
    July 16, 2017
    You can find the full review and all the fancy and/or randomness that accompanies it at It Starts at Midnight 4.5* *Copy provided for review
  • hayden
    July 30, 2017
    i'm kind of frustrated with stephanie kuehn right now.not because of when i am through with you — precisely the opposite. i'm frustrated because this is her fifth book in a row and not one of them has been bad or even kind-of-bad or even not good or even just-OK. she just keeps writing knockouts, dammit! what kind of cyborg shit is going on here?kuehn's latest thriller—as we have come to expect from her but can still graciously appreciate—features an astute psychological bent without using it as i'm kind of frustrated with stephanie kuehn right now.not because of when i am through with you — precisely the opposite. i'm frustrated because this is her fifth book in a row and not one of them has been bad or even kind-of-bad or even not good or even just-OK. she just keeps writing knockouts, dammit! what kind of cyborg shit is going on here?kuehn's latest thriller—as we have come to expect from her but can still graciously appreciate—features an astute psychological bent without using it as a flashy plot point, something that is all too tempting in a split -filled world. it also feels like it's got a 150-page climax. it's got a wonderfully diverse cast, realistic dialogue (yes, teens say potty words!), and the tension builds like a tightening guitar string.kuehn's books give you hangovers (in a wonderful way—i don't often say "i can't wait for this hangover!" unless i'm picking one of her books up), and each one has a unique flavor. the last one, the smaller evil, left me feeling like my mind had been shaken up, soaked, wrung out, and hung up to dry—i wasn't sure what the hell had just happened, which of the seven theories i had was the correct one. with this book, it's like my mind has been squeezed tight, and i'm left with the aches that pulse afterward (in a really pleasant, sad-that-it's-over way)—these characters have left their marks.basically, wow, all the stars, 10/10
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  • viktoria
    July 14, 2017
    I have very mixed feelings about this book.On one hand, holy crap baskets, Ben, you poor baby. I desperately want to cuddle you in a blanket, give you some hot chocolate, and schedule you for the intensive therapy you really, really freaking need, you poor abused and neglected baby who tries and fails so hard. I really appreciated how complex his characterization was, and everyone's was. Because as much as I felt for him, I also had plenty of occasions of "Really, Ben, really? You're making that I have very mixed feelings about this book.On one hand, holy crap baskets, Ben, you poor baby. I desperately want to cuddle you in a blanket, give you some hot chocolate, and schedule you for the intensive therapy you really, really freaking need, you poor abused and neglected baby who tries and fails so hard. I really appreciated how complex his characterization was, and everyone's was. Because as much as I felt for him, I also had plenty of occasions of "Really, Ben, really? You're making that life choice," and "Dude, way to be a douche," so it wasn't just a mindless tragedy-jerker, either. Kudos to Kuehn for really presenting the "hey, I killed my girlfriend, and you'll see how I could do it from a psychological standpoint and believe it, yet you'll genuinely feel for me" story right.On the other hand, I spent the last third of the book going, "When is the girlfriend going to die already? Commme onnn, do iitttt. There's like fifty ways you could've already killed her." Then, I was shocked when I checked the page count towards the end and saw it was only 304 pages. I would've guessed it was at least a hundred pages longer. There are definitely some parts of the story that felt a little bulky to me, and while it was technically in the fast-paced range, it also kind of dragged in parts.But, then again on that third mutant hand, the characterization was on point, probably partially because of those things.tl;dr: In my heart, this is is probably more of a 3, but because of the characterization and technical, I'll do it as a 3.5 bumped up to 4. P.S. for diversity representation, Ben has chronic migraines from a traumatic brain injury, and takes medications for it as well as deals with major obstacles because of it. P.P.S. As much as I hated Ben's mother, I think I hated his bio dad almost equally, if not more. Wtf, jerkface.
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  • Amy's Book Reviews
    July 4, 2017
    **Thanks to First to Read for providing me a complimentary copy of WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU in exchange for my honest review.**GRADE: A-4.5 STARSBen killed his girlfriend Rose, and he's about to tell you why.A heartbreaking story of abandonment, child neglect and domestic violence made Ben who he was. His father left when he was two, his stepfather nearly killed his mother, Ben accidentally killed him before his mother not-accidentally tried to kill him all before the age of eleven. He cares f **Thanks to First to Read for providing me a complimentary copy of WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU in exchange for my honest review.**GRADE: A-4.5 STARSBen killed his girlfriend Rose, and he's about to tell you why.A heartbreaking story of abandonment, child neglect and domestic violence made Ben who he was. His father left when he was two, his stepfather nearly killed his mother, Ben accidentally killed him before his mother not-accidentally tried to kill him all before the age of eleven. He cares for his alcoholic mother, still suffering from injuries from the car accident that didn't kill Ben. He plans to sacrifice his future to continue taking care of her, despite how terribly she treats him. Rose also treats him badly. Mr. Howe, a kindly teacher takes Ben under his wing as assistant to a hiking club, which is how the teens ended up on a mountain. Not everyone would come down alive. Stephanie Kuehn is an automatic preorder for me, so I was thrilled to get an ARC copy of WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU. She drew me into this mystery from the beginning with Ben's confession to killing Rose. I like and empathized with Ben and often wanted to tell him he was worth more than he thought he was. My other favorite characters were Mr and Mrs Howe.While some of the scenarios in the story stretched credulity, I cared what happened to Ben and the other kids. If you like mysteries and complex narrators, WHEN I'M THROUGH WITH YOU is unputdownable.
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  • Lauren Murray
    July 16, 2017
    Thank you to Penguin Young Readers at Penguin Group for providing an advanced reader's copy to this novel through NetGalley. This novel is a booklover's dream! Mystery, sex, and good ole Mother Nature! It's hard to find a Young Adult suspense novel nowadays that is truly suspenseful, but Kuehn grips the reader from the first chapter, and the twists just keep coming. I appreciate the male perspective; there's something authentically honest about Ben's point of view that not every female narrator Thank you to Penguin Young Readers at Penguin Group for providing an advanced reader's copy to this novel through NetGalley. This novel is a booklover's dream! Mystery, sex, and good ole Mother Nature! It's hard to find a Young Adult suspense novel nowadays that is truly suspenseful, but Kuehn grips the reader from the first chapter, and the twists just keep coming. I appreciate the male perspective; there's something authentically honest about Ben's point of view that not every female narrator can pull off. As a lover of the outdoors, I really enjoyed the landscape descriptions riddled throughout the novel; the native Californian in me gobbled up the lush details of the camping trip scenery. At the heart of this novel, though, is a story about suffering - emotional, physical, mental - and the tough choices that one is presented with on their path to healing. There were some ends that were left untied, with one character in particular, but nothing that didn't distract from the overall plot. Recommended for teens 14+
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  • Maja Lisa
    June 7, 2017
    sometimes when you are in the middle of seriously fucking something up, it can feel as if what’s been done can still be contained.In Kuehn’s newest work, we follow Ben, a teenager with a frontal lobe injury and severe migraines. He takes a job orienteering with his high school to help the family with money. We watch as he takes off on a mountaineering trip with a group of his classmates and one aloof teacher.But then they run into a man who calls himself preacher. And things start to get weird, sometimes when you are in the middle of seriously fucking something up, it can feel as if what’s been done can still be contained.In Kuehn’s newest work, we follow Ben, a teenager with a frontal lobe injury and severe migraines. He takes a job orienteering with his high school to help the family with money. We watch as he takes off on a mountaineering trip with a group of his classmates and one aloof teacher.But then they run into a man who calls himself preacher. And things start to get weird, scary, and unpredictable. I liked the book, let me start with that. I enjoyed Keuhn’s writing style and finished the book in a single night. However, I got no real answers from the ending and it left me wondering if something went over my head? I can’t give away too much without giving away spoilers, but it seems to be that everyone is just a jerk, and that is the major plot twist somehow.Loved the writing, kept me interested, not satisfied with the ending and what happened to everyone who wasn’t Ben.I’d like to thank Dutton books and Stephanie Kuehn for the ARC.
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  • Danielle Steenrod
    July 27, 2017
    What was supposed to be a short camping trip in the mountains turns into a fight for survival for 7 teens and their History teacher. Everyone is there for different reasons, some for extra credit in school, some for extra money, and some for unknown reasons. Our main character, Ben, is there for the money. His teacher, Mr. Howe, offers him a job to lead this camping trip for some extra cash. Ben is always looking for ways to make money since he is the sole provider of his household. Ben and his What was supposed to be a short camping trip in the mountains turns into a fight for survival for 7 teens and their History teacher. Everyone is there for different reasons, some for extra credit in school, some for extra money, and some for unknown reasons. Our main character, Ben, is there for the money. His teacher, Mr. Howe, offers him a job to lead this camping trip for some extra cash. Ben is always looking for ways to make money since he is the sole provider of his household. Ben and his mom were in an accident when he was a child that led to his frontal lobe to have been damaged. His mother was injured to the point of not being able to work. Ben’s damage to his frontal lobe leads him to suffer from terrible migraines, which make an appearance a few times while on this camping trip, leaving him incapacitated for hours at a time. There are many other obstacles that these teens must overcome to survive, but you’ll have to read the book to find out the whole story.Guys, I really loved this book. You know from the very beginning that Ben kills his girlfriend, Rose. I found myself trying to solve the puzzle as to why the entire time I was reading. It turns out I wasn’t able to guess why until towards the second half of the book. This is when everything starts to come together and make sense. I had a lot of fun playing the guessing game while reading.There were so many times in this book that I found myself frustrated with the decisions that some of the characters made that I wanted to scream! This didn’t necessarily make the book annoying to read, like in some cases it can. Every decision added to the plot which allowed the story to end the way it did.When I Am Through With You was an entertaining read. I’m a big fan of survival stories and thrillers, so when I read the synopsis for this book, I knew I had to get my hands on it! It was well written with characters that did not fall flat. Each had their own issues and their own stories.I wouldn’t say this book was unpredictable, as I usually hope for when reading a thriller. At times I had no clue what would happen, but as things played out I began to be able to guess how the story would end. This didn’t take away from the story though and I still really enjoyed reading it.However, there are a few things that bothered me. Some loose ends never got tied up, and I wish the ending would have been just a bit longer to tie the story up in a neat little bow. We didn’t get closure for some of the characters and I felt like I was left hanging. Still, in the end this was a fun, entertaining read.I would recommend this book to anyone who enjoys survivor stories or thrillers. I rate this book 4 out of 5 stars. Publication date is August 1, 2017.Thank you to Penguin’s First to Read program for a copy of this book in return for an honest review.
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  • CallMeSensei (Jordan)
    July 31, 2017
    Honestly, I had a really hard time getting into this novel and staying interested. The first chapter is gripping; you meet Ben, our MC, who has a really tough time making his own decisions. He struggles with knowing what to do and when and has let the actions of others define him for most of his life). In walks Rose, a girl who tells him what he wants and then tries to get him to see that he could be more. You know from the very beginning that something will happen between these too. The first c Honestly, I had a really hard time getting into this novel and staying interested. The first chapter is gripping; you meet Ben, our MC, who has a really tough time making his own decisions. He struggles with knowing what to do and when and has let the actions of others define him for most of his life). In walks Rose, a girl who tells him what he wants and then tries to get him to see that he could be more. You know from the very beginning that something will happen between these too. The first chapter is really interesting! But unfortunately, everything spirals (slowly) from there. We got lost in Ben's mind as he deals with Rose going off on a family trip without him and then coming back and acting different. He starts to bond with a teacher at his school. There's a girl he's known forever that he starts spending more time with. Then, Ben and friends decide to hiking in the woods. And let's just say, they should've stayed home. I couldn't suspend my disbelief to get into this part of the story, sadly. There were just too many things that didn't make sense and seemed really absurd. Here were some of the questions I had while reading (note: this may spoil parts of the book for you if you haven't already read it!): (view spoiler)[ 1. I've had this question before with another YA thriller I read this year: Seriously, does no adult check the weather report before taking a bunch of children into the woods? The teacher? The principal? Any of the parents? I find this really hard to believe. 2. The whole bit about going after the suspicious people in the woods because they *might* have lots of money on them: NONE OF THIS MADE LOGICAL SENSE. First of all, they're just assuming that these people are the people they've heard about on the news. Nobody seeks to confirm that until later on. Two, even if they were the people from the news--why would you risk confronting them? If they are the dangerous criminals that escaped from an asylum, why would you not assume that they're armed and dangerous and stay the heck away from them? And even if they had the money, who's to say that it's anywhere nearby? There are just too many variables to make this a plausible plot line. 3. THE TEACHER. He knows that half of the students are on some kind of anxiety or anti-depressant but yet he pretty much lets them run around as they please. He spends half of this book elsewhere while the students are up to something sinister. COME ON! And he even leaves the guy that can't make a decision in charge. His character just irritated me. 4. Poor Ben. This kid could just not catch a break apparently. But I find it really unbelievable that he was not any point placed with child services. His mom was in an abusive relationship and was clearly mentally unstable. The stepdad had loaded guns lying around making it possible for Ben to accidentally shoot him. And then the mom drives him off the road and tries to kill them. BUT NO, the police just accept that all of that was accidental? Come on. (hide spoiler)]NOTE: I received this from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
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  • Sandy Reilly
    July 19, 2017
    Ben struggles to find his own self-worth while saving his classmates from imminent danger during a school-sponsored hiking excursion in this YA adventure. Ben is a small-town kid who has never left his hometown thanks to a harrowing, desperate act as a child that has left his mother widowed, permanently injured, mentally unstable, and an alcoholic. He feels beholden to her to help make her life simpler in any way he can. Despite becoming codependent on his very self-reliant and confident girlfri Ben struggles to find his own self-worth while saving his classmates from imminent danger during a school-sponsored hiking excursion in this YA adventure. Ben is a small-town kid who has never left his hometown thanks to a harrowing, desperate act as a child that has left his mother widowed, permanently injured, mentally unstable, and an alcoholic. He feels beholden to her to help make her life simpler in any way he can. Despite becoming codependent on his very self-reliant and confident girlfriend, Rose, Ben is ready for her to move on from him as he feels he will never be more than he already is now. This hiking trip is his chance to prove he has more to offer Rose, and the world, but when everything begins to go wrong it will be up to him to save their lives.Thoughts: I hate to say this, but I was not a fan of this story. I feel it started as an interesting suspense/thriller and became an adventure/survival that wasn't quite as interesting. Maybe it's because I'm not a huge adventure/survival fan, but the characters also began to wear on my nerves and the lack of real communication and the continuous poor decision-making was frustrating for me. There is a demographic of my HS students that might find the fast pace and rule breaking interesting enough to hold their attention, but with the abundance of adult content (several descriptive sex scenes) and language, I would keep the appropriateness level at grades 12+.
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  • Hannah Orr
    July 25, 2017
    The one thing that made this book extraordinarily readable is the high points of this book. A couple of chapters had a few lines at the end that really just dragged you back in. The writing is simple and concise and tells a story that's quick to the flesh of it and gets you from Point A to Point B with just the right amount of pain and guessing.This was a fantastic thriller. A couple parts of it dragged, but it was probably mostly person preference over the actual plot or writing itself. There w The one thing that made this book extraordinarily readable is the high points of this book. A couple of chapters had a few lines at the end that really just dragged you back in. The writing is simple and concise and tells a story that's quick to the flesh of it and gets you from Point A to Point B with just the right amount of pain and guessing.This was a fantastic thriller. A couple parts of it dragged, but it was probably mostly person preference over the actual plot or writing itself. There was a lot to be discovered and it told a unique story about survival and what makes us human, even in times we're discovering ourselves. Great read! It's only 300 pages, so enough to get you through it quickly and does not bore you. I, personally, was a little disappointed in the actual result of the book, but I'm sure other readers will disagree with me! You'll have to read to find out why and have your own opinion!I received a free book in exchange for my honest review.
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  • Lucie Ferguson
    July 12, 2017
    I got this book free from NetGalley for a review.When a group of troubled teens sets out on a school camping trip, things quickly go wrong. In addition to the problems they face on the mountain, each of them is struggling with secrets - especially our main guy, Ben, who experiences sudden migraines and has a dark family history."When I Am Through With You" is uncompromisingly dark and brutally tragic, but also such a gripping story that I had trouble putting it down. Kuehn plants many uneasy, fo I got this book free from NetGalley for a review.When a group of troubled teens sets out on a school camping trip, things quickly go wrong. In addition to the problems they face on the mountain, each of them is struggling with secrets - especially our main guy, Ben, who experiences sudden migraines and has a dark family history."When I Am Through With You" is uncompromisingly dark and brutally tragic, but also such a gripping story that I had trouble putting it down. Kuehn plants many uneasy, foreboding moments throughout that will worry you enough to read faster! I will say that it is much heavier than I usually like, and some of the tragedy is almost to the point of absurdness. However, I think it will be a big hit with the older teens at my library who want a thriller that has more weight and backstory than your average disaster book. It could almost be in the adult section instead of YA.
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  • Mandy
    July 25, 2017
    Omg.Review to come.
  • Ann
    July 21, 2017
    I enjoyed the pacing, setting, language and tone of this young adult thriller. But I had difficulty relating to any of the characters. It felt like a screenplay where all the characters were overacted. And as an avid and longtime backpacker (starting in my teens), I found the scenario absurd. I couldn't buy the number of absurdly bad decisions, not just by the main character and his fellow teens, but by every single adult in the book. Just ... no. Statistically, you could throw darts to determin I enjoyed the pacing, setting, language and tone of this young adult thriller. But I had difficulty relating to any of the characters. It felt like a screenplay where all the characters were overacted. And as an avid and longtime backpacker (starting in my teens), I found the scenario absurd. I couldn't buy the number of absurdly bad decisions, not just by the main character and his fellow teens, but by every single adult in the book. Just ... no. Statistically, you could throw darts to determine your decisions and have a better record than these characters did. All that said, I read the book voraciously and just kept telling myself to suspend my disbelief. I will for sure read more Stephanie Kuehn in the future. [I received an ARC of this book through Penguin's First to Read program.]
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  • ElphabaNewlin
    July 22, 2017
    If you haven't taken to heart my constant heralding of Stephanie Kuehn, goddammit, get into it because she's amazing. Her books are almost always a slam dunk when it comes to plotting, characterization, and suspense, and I am always looking forward to new ones by her. I was so, so lucky while at ALA to get an ARC of her newest book, WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU, and I can easily say that it was worth the self imposed wait when I finally picked it up this week. Ben has never felt like his life was If you haven't taken to heart my constant heralding of Stephanie Kuehn, goddammit, get into it because she's amazing. Her books are almost always a slam dunk when it comes to plotting, characterization, and suspense, and I am always looking forward to new ones by her. I was so, so lucky while at ALA to get an ARC of her newest book, WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU, and I can easily say that it was worth the self imposed wait when I finally picked it up this week. Ben has never felt like his life was worth too much. Ever since he and his addict mother were in an accident, he has had severe migraines that debilitate him. He knows that his destiny is to stay in this town after high school and take care of his mother. He has two good things going for him: his intense girlfriend, Rose, and becoming the student lead of the orienteering club. On it's first expedition Ben, Rose, and a number of other students go into the mountains expecting to see the wilderness. But what they find instead is far more dangerous. Now it's a fight for survival, as Ben's violent past and the toxicity of his relationship with Rose start to seep into his present.Once again, Kuehn has written a book of damaged kids and dark and violent themes and has hit it out of the park. This book does not shy away from the bleakness that is Ben's life, from his broken relationship with his mother to his manipulative girlfriend to the violence that he's experienced in the past, to the camping trip gone awry. I am a firm believer in not feeling a need to sugarcoat for teens out of fear they can't handle it, and Kuehn does NOT sugarcoat. But she is also very good at never making it feel gratuitous or exploitative. Ben is such a complex and well rounded character that he was a real fascinating person to follow, and even with him revealing certain truths about the outcome of this story at the beginning I was still interesting to hear his side. I also was happily surprised by the conflict that they find in the woods (no spoilers here), because it wasn't really a usual run of the mill 'nature is all powerful' woods survival story. While one of the reveals at the end regarding some character motivations (again, no spoilers) felt a bit harder to swallow for me, everything else was so spot on and realistically teenager-y that I was able to forgive it pretty easily. I will say that, like her other books, this book is dark and not really for the faint hearted. But I am so happy that Kuehn is here to give teens the option to delve into the darker and grittier if they so choose.I really liked WHEN I AM THROUGH WITH YOU, and I once again eagerly await what Kuehn comes out with next!!
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  • Samantha
    August 1, 2017
    Teenager Ben Gibson is not winning at life. He has chronic migraines as a result of a car accident he and his mother had when he was a child. His mother is chronically ill and depends on Ben to provide care and emotional support, but does nothing in return but snipe, criticizes, and accuse. While many would think Ben's girlfriend Rose definitely puts him in the winner's circle, her over-whelming demands has Ben confused about what love might really look like. When Ben decides to assist one of hi Teenager Ben Gibson is not winning at life. He has chronic migraines as a result of a car accident he and his mother had when he was a child. His mother is chronically ill and depends on Ben to provide care and emotional support, but does nothing in return but snipe, criticizes, and accuse. While many would think Ben's girlfriend Rose definitely puts him in the winner's circle, her over-whelming demands has Ben confused about what love might really look like. When Ben decides to assist one of his favorite teachers in a Mountain Orienteering class, he thinks maybe this is his chance to be successful. His teacher certainly seems to think highly of him and is perhaps one of the first people in Ben's life to truly believe in him. He has no idea that this one trip will brand him a murderer and send him to prison, perhaps for life. Stephanie Kuehn does an excellent job of creating high school life in a small town, where some of the teens recognize they will never go anywhere but where they are now and others are plotting to escape as soon as they get their diplomas. While some of her characters may seem cliche, their stories are believable tropes that any young adult reader will recognize from their own lives or other YA novels they know and love. Ben's desire to take care of everyone, no matter what price he pays, is both heroic and tragic. Rose's confusing mixed signals make her a character many will find both appalling and intriguing. As Ben's tale unwinds and the reader discovers some of the horrible secrets he hides, the pages won't turn fast enough to get to the end of story and the heart of Ben's truth. This novel will find a wide audience in both teen and YA loving adult audiences and offers something for nearly every kind of reader. Recommended for high school and up. Profanity, drinking, drug use, gun violence, and sexual situations make it inappropriate for most young audiences. Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for providing an ARC in exchange for a fair and honest review.
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  • Annette
    August 1, 2017
    While a bit far-fetched, When I Am Through with You is exciting and compelling.A teenager, Ben, tells the story from his prison cell and it is apparent very early that he has killed his girlfriend, Rose. While this may seem like a confessional, it is really a survival story. Ben is excited for his first trip away from home, where he has been taking care of his alcoholic mother for years. He's going to lead a group of teens on a hike up a mountain. Everything turns sideways very quickly, and soon While a bit far-fetched, When I Am Through with You is exciting and compelling.A teenager, Ben, tells the story from his prison cell and it is apparent very early that he has killed his girlfriend, Rose. While this may seem like a confessional, it is really a survival story. Ben is excited for his first trip away from home, where he has been taking care of his alcoholic mother for years. He's going to lead a group of teens on a hike up a mountain. Everything turns sideways very quickly, and soon the teens are fighting for their lives.These teens could be considered misfits. Ben certainly has a sordid past and suffers from debilitating migraines, The reason for this is clearly some trauma in his past, but we don't find out the details until later in the story. The other characters are distinct individuals with their own hang-ups that all adds to the drama. The plot hinges on some unlikely coincidences and a plethora of bad decisions made by these teens. The lone adult along for supervision gives Ben too much independence, given his inexperience. But without this, there would be no story.The pace is riveting, and although the reader can easily see the dire consequences coming, it still kept me turning pages. And the consequences are indeed drastic, as several characters meet with violent ends. The text is rife with f-bombs and many sexual situations, so I would keep it for mature teens only.Even though we know from the beginning that Ben is incarcerated, the ending felt unfinished and unsatisfying. I just wanted more. I didn't feel like Ben should be in prison, and I want to know how this all turns out.Teens who can handle some brutal violence and a less-than-happy resolution will enjoy this compelling struggle
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  • Jennifer
    July 12, 2017
    Wow! This book had me feeling a gamut of emotions. This started out with curiosity about what is going to happen on the hiking trip because you know that this group of teens is going to go on this trip and things were going to go bad, but you don’t know how or when. Initially, I had trouble connecting with the narrator because his tone was very remote, almost disconnected, but as you read you find out there is a reason for this, that it is a result of a traumatic event in his past. Also, I was c Wow! This book had me feeling a gamut of emotions. This started out with curiosity about what is going to happen on the hiking trip because you know that this group of teens is going to go on this trip and things were going to go bad, but you don’t know how or when. Initially, I had trouble connecting with the narrator because his tone was very remote, almost disconnected, but as you read you find out there is a reason for this, that it is a result of a traumatic event in his past. Also, I was curious about what was going on in the heads of the other characters, as it was somewhat of a mystery due to the narrator’s inability to read others emotions well, and the trip serves as a background for the main characters internal journey to figure out what is going on mentally/emotionally with his fellow hikers and himself. However, the writing is so compelling that I couldn’t stop reading. Once I was into the story, I was frustrated with the actions of several of the characters, as many of the choices they made were very self-serving, but by the end, I found myself left with a feeling of sadness that things turned out like they did, as no one intended for things to end so badly. One thing I would say though, and this may be one of the best things you can say about a book, is that I wanted more, even just a couple more pages telling us what happens with the main character’s legal troubles in the end. I received an advanced copy of this book from Penguin's First To Read program in exchange for an honest review.
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  • Heather A
    July 12, 2017
    I received a copy from Penguin First To ReadI really loved the last book I read by this author, and was really looking forward to this new one. After reading it, initially I gave it a four star rating, I really liked the main character, but found the twist in the novel quite disappointing. And after thinking about how to review it for more than a week after I finished, I realised I just didn’t like it that much at all. So I’ve lowered the rating to a two star.The main character Ben is in jail fo I received a copy from Penguin First To ReadI really loved the last book I read by this author, and was really looking forward to this new one. After reading it, initially I gave it a four star rating, I really liked the main character, but found the twist in the novel quite disappointing. And after thinking about how to review it for more than a week after I finished, I realised I just didn’t like it that much at all. So I’ve lowered the rating to a two star.The main character Ben is in jail for killing his girlfriend Rose. There’s something really compelling about Ben’s voice. He makes no apologies for his actions. He’s quite blunt in some respects, but in others almost quite passive and pessimistic. Calls himself a realist, but it’s almost quite depressing. He’s from a small town he never sees himself getting out of. He spends most of his time taking care of his mother who suffers from injuries from a car wreck and depression. He doesn’t see much prospect of ever getting out of his small town, thinking he’ll be stuck taking care of his mom for the foreseeable future and being stuck with minimum wage jobs. Though you do get the impression he could be quite intelligent if he puts his mind to it.When he meets a girl called Rose who decides she’s going to be his girlfriend, things change for him. Can’t say I really liked Rose much. She’s a drama queen who has to have things her way. When this book started I had plenty of ideas for how he may have killed her and the why was almost understandable.The bulk of the story is a camping trip gone wrong. Ben and a group of other students heading up to a local mountain range. Ben suffers from debilitating migraines as a result of the same car accident that injured his mom. There’s also hints of something he did to cause the accident, also that he killed his step-father. This is all explained in context as the novel progresses. It goes to explaining some of his pessimistic personality.There’s a handful of other kids on the camping trip, two stoners/drinkers, Rose and her brother, a girl Ben is sort of friends with, a few others and a nice teacher who seems to be the only adult encouraging Ben to do something with his life. At some point while separated from the main group Ben, the other girl and the two stoner/drinkers stumble across another group of campus. A creepy old man and two weird women with him. Someone’s heard a story about escaped convicts and boat loads of hidden cash. The weather is getting worse.And things start going wrong very quickly. But it takes an incredibly long time (or it seems like) for anything to actually happen. It’s very slow and when things finally start happening, it’s…like…eh. The actual killing of Rose was nothing like I had been picturing when thinking of the start of the novel. It felt rather anticlimactic.Despite Ben’s shifting personality from pessimistic to passive aggressive, I did find his tone of voice incredibly compelling. Even though the story was gloomy and rather boring, there was something about Ben’s telling of it that made it a quick read to want to know what happened but in the end it was all rather disappointing.Looking forward to the author’s next book, but didn’t really like this one much.
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  • Samantha
    July 28, 2017
    A List of Thoughts: I totally forgot how good Stephanie Kuehn is at being creepy. Book starts off with a high school senior waiting to go on trial for murder... cue the doom music The writing is infuriatingly addictive - You want to know what's happening and why and Ben, the narrator, dangles it all just out of reach until he's ready to tell you. The characters are fantastically deep and multi-dimensional. Each individual has their own story, their own purpose, and their own key role in th A List of Thoughts: I totally forgot how good Stephanie Kuehn is at being creepy. Book starts off with a high school senior waiting to go on trial for murder... cue the doom music The writing is infuriatingly addictive - You want to know what's happening and why and Ben, the narrator, dangles it all just out of reach until he's ready to tell you. The characters are fantastically deep and multi-dimensional. Each individual has their own story, their own purpose, and their own key role in the narrative as it unfolds. When I am Through With You pulls you in and makes you want to know why. You know what happened, but you want the why and the how and the when and ARGGGGH. So wonderful and frustrating. This book keeps you on the edge of your seat even though you know the end game... or do you? IT'S SO GREAT, GUYS! I love it when books make me need to know what is going on. That's evidence of a good story right then and there. Basically, guys, read the book and strap yourselves in for one wild ride. 
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  • Sunsettowers
    July 27, 2017
    I received an ARC of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. This did not affect my opinion of the book or my review itself.Ben just wanted to find some meaning for his life, some hope for a future he's not looking forward to. But leading what should have been a simple camping trip soon turns into tragedy. It's a story Ben will tell--but he's going to take his time.This is a great concept for a book. From the start, there is so much suspense. You know Ben is only doling ou I received an ARC of this book from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. This did not affect my opinion of the book or my review itself.Ben just wanted to find some meaning for his life, some hope for a future he's not looking forward to. But leading what should have been a simple camping trip soon turns into tragedy. It's a story Ben will tell--but he's going to take his time.This is a great concept for a book. From the start, there is so much suspense. You know Ben is only doling out little details at a time, and you don't know how much to trust him and how much to read between the lines. This makes you have to keep turning pages, all with a building sense of dread.The concept didn't play through the way I was hoping for. The first third of the book felt like it was set up as a classic unreliable narrator, eerie, super psychologically suspenseful read. But then events veered onto a path that just didn't work for me.While this book definitely kept me turning pages-Kuehn has a talent for creating suspense-this book just didn't do it for me.
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  • Rebekah Crain
    July 27, 2017
    I was looking for a book that would draw me in so completely I couldn't put it down. Color me happy when this book proved to do just that! When I Am Through with You is a a book I all but devoured in one sitting. I was engrossed from the start, and found the the storyline to be utterly thrilling. The book's main character is in jail for murder, this we find out straight away. What we read, however, is his journal detailing everything that brought him to that fateful, quintessential moment. It's I was looking for a book that would draw me in so completely I couldn't put it down. Color me happy when this book proved to do just that! When I Am Through with You is a a book I all but devoured in one sitting. I was engrossed from the start, and found the the storyline to be utterly thrilling. The book's main character is in jail for murder, this we find out straight away. What we read, however, is his journal detailing everything that brought him to that fateful, quintessential moment. It's a story of self discovery, heartache, love, survival, and ultimately freedom. Definitely recommended!Thanks to the author, publishers, and NetGalley for providing the review opportunity.
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  • Sonja
    July 4, 2017
    Wow. I am so excited to recommend this to teens when it comes out. Stephanie Kuehn writes such interesting stories. Always a bit twisty. Always with damaged teens around every corner. When I Am Through with You is the complex tale of a group of teens - led by one unfortunate adult teacher - who go for a hike and camping trip that goes horribly wrong in several exciting ways. The reader begins with the knowledge that somebody dies on the trip, but the truth as it unravels is so, so much worse tha Wow. I am so excited to recommend this to teens when it comes out. Stephanie Kuehn writes such interesting stories. Always a bit twisty. Always with damaged teens around every corner. When I Am Through with You is the complex tale of a group of teens - led by one unfortunate adult teacher - who go for a hike and camping trip that goes horribly wrong in several exciting ways. The reader begins with the knowledge that somebody dies on the trip, but the truth as it unravels is so, so much worse than that. The writing is so taught and compelling that the reading of it makes it hard to sleep. Amazing!
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  • Nannette Demmler
    July 21, 2017
    This book is so many different things on so many different levels. I initially picked it up on NetGalley because of this line:“A gripping story of survival and the razor’s-edge difference between perfect cruelty and perfect love.”It is a gripping story that is hard to put down. It is a story of survival. It is a story of tragic childhoods and messed up teenagers. It is a mystery and a thriller. But ultimately it is about love and sacrifice.Read the rest of the review on my blog at https://elnade This book is so many different things on so many different levels. I initially picked it up on NetGalley because of this line:“A gripping story of survival and the razor’s-edge difference between perfect cruelty and perfect love.”It is a gripping story that is hard to put down. It is a story of survival. It is a story of tragic childhoods and messed up teenagers. It is a mystery and a thriller. But ultimately it is about love and sacrifice.Read the rest of the review on my blog at https://elnadesbookchat.com/2017/07/2...
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  • Susie
    July 31, 2017
    I gotta be honest...I did not love the way this book gave it all away in the beginning. I mean, I didn't think it would be possible for the author to pull me into the story when I already knew the end. But I SSSOOO did not know the end! I mean, bam! The truth of what happened was colored completely by WHAT happened. And how it happened. And why. Really really well done suspense and action. I felt scared and frozen by the end of the book, just as the characters were. I enjoyed it thoroughly and w I gotta be honest...I did not love the way this book gave it all away in the beginning. I mean, I didn't think it would be possible for the author to pull me into the story when I already knew the end. But I SSSOOO did not know the end! I mean, bam! The truth of what happened was colored completely by WHAT happened. And how it happened. And why. Really really well done suspense and action. I felt scared and frozen by the end of the book, just as the characters were. I enjoyed it thoroughly and will look for other books from this author.
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  • Vera
    July 6, 2017
    I received an ARC of this book from the publisher at ALA Annual 2017, and I LOVED it. Stephanie Kuehn is one of my favorite YA authors, and this newest book does not disappoint! The twists in the plot are completely unpredictable, and the straightforward writing style works perfectly for the genre. The main character, Ben, has a very compelling voice, and all the supporting characters are deep and complex as well. Do not be fooled by the brevity of this amazing book - Stephanie Kuehn packs a lot I received an ARC of this book from the publisher at ALA Annual 2017, and I LOVED it. Stephanie Kuehn is one of my favorite YA authors, and this newest book does not disappoint! The twists in the plot are completely unpredictable, and the straightforward writing style works perfectly for the genre. The main character, Ben, has a very compelling voice, and all the supporting characters are deep and complex as well. Do not be fooled by the brevity of this amazing book - Stephanie Kuehn packs a lot into its relatively few pages (as usual). Highly highly recommend!
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